Alex's Positive Birth

Alex, Steve and baby Dawson.

My birth began with spontaneous labour 3 days before my due date. I lost my mucus plug in the morning and then my waters broke at 12:30 that night. I wasn’t feeling any contractions so hoped they would kick in before too long- but it turned out I didn’t need to worry. Even though I was a first time mum, within half an hour I was in established labour. Two hours later my midwife visited and was very surprised that I was 4 cms dilated. We went to hospital by which time I was now 6 cms. So I pretty much skipped the whole slow build up and as a result didn't end up using some of my prepared tools and strategies. I do think the process of having prepared them was helpful for my mindset though.

At the hospital I was lucky to be in the MGP, but ended up with a backup midwife I hadn’t met before. Luckily she was amazing, and I knew that she was coming from the same care model. I also had my student midwife whom I’d connected really well with and who checked in with me around preferences of my birth plan as she was familiar with it. I already knew what the hospital could provide- even zooper doopers!- so didn’t worry.

I laboured leaning on the bed, lying on the bed with a peanut ball, on the toilet and finally got to go in the bath once it had filled up which was surprisingly wonderful. I used the TENS for a bit beforehand which was helpful but I should have used it at a higher setting as I kept going to press the boost button and realising I’d left it on. I also clung to my cheap $2 Kmart comb for dear life the whole time. I could ride the waves of contractions and move my body in helpful ways. If I ever felt it becoming too much with a bit of encouragement I could get back in the zone which I don't believe I could have done without all the mental preparation work I'd done.

My partner was also amazing- I think he got even more from your course than me. He had the words of encouragement and gentle touch down perfectly and was so intently focused and tuned in to me and my needs that I really felt like we went through it together.

Things had slowed down a bit when I was 8cm and got in the bath, but I still got to 10 cms, only using gas, just like I wanted! Unfortunately I didn’t get the water birth I had planned. My contractions had become less regular, my weak urges to push had stopped, and it didn't feel productive anymore. My baby Dawson was posterior which made things more difficult. I tried getting out of the bath and changing positions but I told staff I felt something was blocking me within my body rather than it being mental. Dawson was also showing some distress by having done a poo but his heart rate was still good. They offered oxytocin but I just knew that would only increase the pain and not help get him out, so we tried an instrumental delivery (both methods) and then I ended up having a caesarean.

It turned out Dawson had a giant head (over the 99th percentile) and due to his posterior position was trying to come out at the largest point. So my instincts and listening to my body was right!!! I felt very empowered that I’d listened to my body and had trusted that. Everyone was surprised he was so big, especially his head, as due to the shape it hadn’t felt big.

Dawson was born healthy, 4.2kg, and with a long body. Meeting him was just the most amazing moment!!!

Although on the surface this may not sound like a positive birth story I felt incredible after it. I was so proud I got to 10 cms without medication! I felt like I still got the natural birth experience I wanted. I felt informed and like I was leading decision making. I had been scared of a caesarean but at the time I was confident to have it (and it ended up not being bad or scary after all!). I still get excited thinking of my birth story.

Thank you for all your help preparing so that it was far from negative or traumatic and instead a wonderful experience!

Photos and birth story shared with permission. Alex and Steve attended a group Held Birth Course with Hannah.